I work in Silicon Valley, and I’m a stoner. Let me explain. Like all things, it’s not quite that simple. I’ve only once had someone guess I was a stoner (and that was a very close friend after years of knowing me). But a stoner I am – I smoke every single day. Not always medicinally, either.
However, I have a neurological back condition which sometimes flares up and makes walking difficult. Yesterday, I spent the entire day at work limping because of severe pain. I worked from my desk, on couches, with cushions, I tried everything – severe, severe pain. The pain pills weren’t helping.
I got home, and pulled out my secret stash. A black plastic art box filled with organized cannabis and associated artificats. It’s my habit to go home and get high every day, but today, I’m on a specific mission.
I decide tonight I need to create a special blend to counteract my back pain. You see, long ago stoners decided they liked the principle cannabinoid in cannabis, THC. They like it so much they bred for it in favor of the molecular yang to it’s yin, CBD. CBD is non-psychoactive and even counteracts the effects of THC, theoretically making you -less- high, but does wonders for pain relief.
I blended three strains. 50% Platinum Romulan. It’s a heavy indica, 18% THC and no CBD to speak of. The indica creates relaxation effects and a ‘rock on your head’ stone feeling. 25% Inferno OG. This is a sativa-dominant hybrid famous for pain relief. I then added the coup de gras – 25% Lion Fire. This high-CBD strain from Jamaica brings this blend up to about 6% CBD overall and brings the THC level down to about 15% overall. Not bad numbers.
After quickly doing my cannabis alchemy, I packed a bowl of my blend into my Pax by Ploom, a compact and discreet vaporizer. I click in the mouthpiece to the Pax, and it begins heating.
A mere minute later, the light turns green. I take four puffs in short succession. The taste is earthy and flowery, reminding me of Oolong tea.
My back pain… Is simply gone, in the space of four minutes. I nearly cry from relief. The pain that had me nearly collapsing on the way home from the bus stop mere moments before is GONE. Miraculously, unbelievably gone. I immediately say a quick prayer of thanks.
However, I have a full bowl packed. Might as well make my way through it.
Over the course of the next 20 minutes, I finish the bowl, around 30 puffs, cycling my way up through the temperature settings of the Pax.
I feel as though I’m in a glass cube inside a hurricane. The noise and stirring of the outside world can’t touch me. I’m the rock in the middle of the river. I feel the telltale Romulan head-ridges forming – picture someone’s fingers closing around your head from back to front, but in a pleasant way. My limbs are tingling strongly. I’m very, very happy. In fact, the CBD seems to have dialed up the THC’s effects, and I’m higher from one bowl of this stuff than I would have been from three bowls of all-THC bud.
In the morning, I will go back to my job. I will fight hard for my company. I’ll endure my back pain with what little relief over-the-counter pain pills can bring, because I know being high at work would be inappropriate, and I would never betray my company like that. But knowing I have this secret weapon against my back pain and migraines when I get home?
Cannabis. Is. Medicine.
Some choice comments:
It’s the best thing ever, I have at least 1 migraine a day, and each and every time I end the pain it feels like the most liberating moment of my life all over again.
These are the kinds of things that people need to read regarding Cannabis. A human being that cannot get the relief needed from pharmaceuticals but instead, finds relief from a plant growing on this beautiful Earth for thousands of years.
I long for the day where our government will do what is best for their people, not their wallets.
Last night I talked to someone, hes wife had a hysterectomy and was in alot of pain. She found MJ more effective than her prescription pain pill. We are talking about ~3lbs that were taken out of her body, pretty remarkable pain relief. Using both canapills (more CBD-from already vaped weed+stems) and using a special strain that is very good at pain relief (I believe its white widow crossed with skunk). MJ has a very wide range of effects and hopefully as it becomes legal more options will be available.
I have moderate insomnia. I usually can’t fall asleep until after 3am even if I only got a couple hours of sleep the night before. Also, once or twice a week I’ll inadvertently pull an all nighter simply from not being able to sleep. As a college student this was affecting my grades since my insomnia would be heightened if I knew I had anything important to do the next day like a test.
I turned to sleeping pills to help me out. Let me just say that sleeping pills are garbage. The amount of zquil I have to take in order to fall asleep causes me to still be tired/hungover in the morning. But then I thought about cannabis. Since I was an occasional stoner I was quite aware of how sleepy I get after smoking some strong indica, and I wondered if I could use smoking as a sleeping aid.
That was two months ago and now my grades are impeccable, partly from cannabis. I can get 5+ great nights of sleep every week and I wake up feeling rested, not hungover or exhausted. When I tell people that I smoke to get my grades high they think I’m joking, but I guess that’s my little secret.
Smoking helps me sleep at least six hours instead of the normal zero to three I regularly get. I can’t wait for it to get legalized here to so I don’t have to worry about almost falling asleep while driving because in a week I might only sleep fifteen hours total. Yet it’s addictive and harmful so I can only use actual addictive medicines that are going to ruin my liver or kidneys eventually because I can’t sleep.